My Love Letter to Southern California
My 5-minute little love letter to Southern California.
Highlights!
00:24 🌅 Classic Californian Sunset
00:29 🌴 Classic Californian Sunrise
00:49 🤸🏿♀️ Unofficial SuperBowl Show
01:13 🐦 The World’s Cutest Bird?
01:26 🦍 One Silverback Greets Another
01:58 🌮 The World’s Tastiest Tacos?
02:43 🥂A Gaggle of Angelinos
02:58 🍳 Olde American Diner
03:21 🏙️ The LA Skyline
03:48 😍 James being James
03:56 🏫 Abbott Elementary
04:21 🧙♂️ Middle-aged Wizardry
04:46 🏆 Lunch with an Emmy Winner
04:55 🪞 Artistic Mirror Shot
05:08 😎 House-wives/husbands of the OC
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Christmas in the Maldives
It’s not that easy to island-hop through the Maldives, because all the seaplanes fan out from the capital city, Malé. So once you’re at your resort island, you’re pretty much stuck there. As a restless traveler who bores easily, this was a bit of a concern. But as a restless traveler who also a) dislikes sand, lotion, and the mixture of sand and lotion; b) burns to a crisp after five minutes in the sun; c) usually avoids being in and out of water because of the constant juggle between contact lenses, glasses, sunglasses and prescription sunglasses; d) has yet to find a flip-flop that doesn’t chafe; e) has yet to find a swimming trunk that doesn’t chafe; f) is terrified of the open sea; and g) is even more terrified of spending money indulgently, I didn’t know which concern concerned me the most. So in the end, I decided not to worry about any of them.
🤓 Maldives Facts 🤓
🇲🇻 It’s the world’s flattest and lowest-lying country. 80% is only 1 metre above sea level, and the highest point stands at a whopping… 2 metres.
🇲🇻 It has the world’s highest national divorce rate. On average, a woman in the Maldives has divorced three times before the age of 30.
🇲🇻 The word ‘atoll’ comes from the Maldives. An atoll is a ring-shaped series of islands or reefs surrounding a lagoon. The Maldives consists of 1,192 coral islands grouped in a double chain of 26 atolls.
🇲🇻 Many of the smaller islands have a single purpose. For example one is a trash dump; another is for oil storage; another holds the prison.
🇲🇻 The alphabet used in the Maldives is called Dhivehi, and it’s unique. It looks like this: .ދިވެހި އަކުރު ތަފާތު ވެއެވެ. ހީވަނީ މިހެންނެވެ
🇲🇻 The Maldives is one of the world's most geographically dispersed countries. Many inhabitants on the very smallest islands have little contact with the outside world.
🇲🇻 All the famous white-sand beaches in the Maldives are the result of undigested reef material eaten by parrotfish.
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Cultural Appropriation in China?
Living in China is the best way to ensure that your life is spent constantly tying yourself up into intellectual knots. My ‘quandary of the week’ this week was about cultural appropriation.
Let me set the scene. Cultural appropriation is a situation where someone from a dominant position in society inappropriately adopts a tradition from someone in a less dominant position. And we all know what this means through a European/American lens, a white person there is clearly trespassing on someone else’s culture if they inappropriately wear afro wigs, Sikh turbans or Native American headdresses, for example. But I can potentially see plenty of grey areas to this too. For example, is it cultural appropriation when someone who speaks with an accent from a more affluent part of a country adopts a regional accent from elsewhere? Or what about when a white person becomes a fan of hip hop - with its specific African American historical context - and then starts wearing clothes associated with that style? I guess the key aspect is in what kind of adoption is deemed ‘appropriate’ and ‘inappropriate’, and we can all see how these definitions can change as society progresses… or regresses.
In China, there’s an academic term for cultural appropriation, it’s 文化挪用 [wénhuà nuóyòng]. This is way above my conversational pay grade, so I have no idea how many people even know this oblique reference. I asked a few Mainlanders, Hongkongers and Taiwanese people in my circle, and even the ones who knew it didn’t really think it applied to China. So although the dominant culture here is the Han, there’s no reckoning that a Chinese Han person wearing clothes from a minority ethnicity could be deemed intrinsically inappropriate or offensive.
It is common practice here for Han Chinese tourists to take photos of themselves in local costumes when they visit areas populated by ethnic minorities. The people I asked told me that they wouldn’t associate this with the concept of cultural appropriation, and that the behaviour of the wearer was based on respectful curiosity, thousands of years of cultural intermingling, and a genuine appreciation of the aesthetic beauty of the garments. When I asked about what the minority ethnicities themselves might think about this, for most people it was the first time they had thought about it in that way. The ones who answered did so confidently, saying that the ethnic minorities aren’t offended. At the very worst, it was a kind of Chinese ‘cosplay’ done out of reverence rather than mockery.
It’s a tricky one to figure out, because China exists outside the specific history of colonialism and slavery that typifies the way we look at cultural appropriation in Europe and the Americas. So it’s inaccurate to do a like-for-like comparison, and I try not to impose my own cultural baggage onto anyone else. What muddies the waters further is that the government in China has made a point of pushing the narrative of 和谐 [‘harmony’] between Han Chinese and the other 55 officially-recognised ethnicities in China, so anything that speaks against this is seen as political sacrilege. So there’s zero chance that I could witness an open debate about this, even if my Mandarin skills were up to it. Which they most definitely aren’t.
Now we’re getting to my quandary of the week. We had been invited to a traditional Chinese wedding, which in itself is quite rare in Shanghai. Most people these days have modern weddings which would be recognisable to anyone around the world. But this was very different, the bridal party were all dressed in amazing traditional attire and performed a variety of ceremonies that harked back to rites of old. So in a way, the wedding was a sort of traditional Chinese ‘cosplay’, where our fellow Chinese guests were dazzled to a rare experience in just the same way as we were. With this in mind, we had been told that the bride would appreciate if we respected the occasion, and were encouraged to wear formal Chinese attire.
I’ve lived in China for almost a decade, and have made a point of never wearing anything traditionally ‘Chinese’, lest it be misconstrued as a disrespect to my host country. Yet we were convinced that this was clearly a case of ‘appropriateness’, so we bit the bullet and got some Chinese-style suits made. That would have been the end of this anecdote, were it not for what happened on the night of the wedding. Luckily we arrived early, so we were able to see guests as they trickled into the venue. And it soon became clear that there had been a massive miscommunication. None of the other guests were wearing anything approaching traditional Chinese clothing. In fact, many of them appeared to be wearing clothes that they had worn earlier that day. We’re talking jeans, even sweatpants. Meanwhile I was sat there looking like a poor imitation of Sun Yat-Sen.
We solved the issue by quickly removing our jackets, and we were able to blend in with the other guests a little easier. But not before we were noticed by the bride and groom themselves, who both greeted us with straight faces. One day I would like to get them drunk and ask them what they truly thought about our ridiculous appearance. I hope it will become a funny family anecdote that they can tell their kids in the future. But until then I will add this to the countless other embarrassments that seem to have constituted my life up till today.
If there is any moral to this story, let it be this. The definition of cultural appropriation can indeed change over time, perhaps even in China. Sometimes it takes a generation, and sometimes it literally takes FIVE MINUTES OF TESTICLE-SHRINKING TORTURE. So when in doubt, don’t be an arse, and wear your regular clothes.
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Imperial Eccentricity
Happy Thanksgiving from Shanghai to everyone who celebrates it!
Clearly the thing for which I’m most grateful is my American husband, because our marriage gives me the excuse to have a massive meal tonight, with all the trimmings. 🦃🇺🇸
In the spirit of our transatlantic union, I’m posting this graphic which I found online. To those Americans who are proud of their eccentric adherence to imperial measurements… this Thanksgiving, just be grateful you’re not as eccentric as the Brits. 🤪🇬🇧
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Human Dignity
I live a privileged life. So when it comes to the marketplace of opinions, I tend to do more listening than talking. But unlike other privileged people, I have the experience of living in a place which gives me a tiny sliver of insight into what it feels like to be a minority. To be a migrant. And to be at the receiving end of a system that doesn’t care one jot about me. To feel - on a visceral level - that my human dignity can be taken away at the whim of the authorities. And to value my privilege all the more, versus those whose human dignity is crushed on a daily basis, and in their own place of birth.
I have family living in Israel, and I’m the grandchild of holocaust survivors. So I feel a deep heartbreak about the utterly reprehensible actions of Hamas this week. I don’t even know what words to use. Inhuman, sadistic, diabolical? None of them feel strong enough. But ‘heartbreak’ is certainly the right word. That’s not just a poetic flourish, I can literally feel the pain in my chest right now for every Israeli. However, that’s not the only pain I can feel. I can also feel the heartbreak of a Palestinian who lives a life hopelessly lacking in human dignity. There are no words to describe what ‘burning indignity’ feels like. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, just try to imagine a cocktail of rage, fear and despair. The taste is disgusting and ineradicable.
I’m writing this because I have both Jewish and Muslim people in my circle, Israelis and Palestinians. Like you, I can’t personally solve one damn thing. But what I can do is somehow put into words the complex feelings that I’m experiencing, and affirm that it is possible to sit with these two heartbreaks at the same time. Some of you will feel that it’s too soon for this privileged and out-of-touch liberal to ‘both sides’ the argument from his life of relative luxury in Shanghai. While there are people still in the desperate throes of grief. While there are still innocent hostages whose lives are in the balance. You know the taste of human indignity, and I’m truly sorry for offending you by writing this now. But now is exactly the time when the temptation to dehumanise the ‘other side’ is most enticing. I despise the posts I’m reading that justify the Palestinian cause without any reference to the despicable acts of Hamas, whose charter seeks to eradicate and erase every living Israeli. But I also abhor those who would cast all Palestinians as barbaric monsters, whose lives aren’t worth a scrap.
I live a privileged life. And I can’t solve a damn thing. But I can put into words the complex feelings that I’m experiencing.
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Parched in Portugal
We spent the last week town-hopping through Portugal, from Lisbon up to Porto. 🚙🇵🇹 And of course we spent our time taking as many goofy videos as possible. 🎬🤡
There were only so many quaint town squares and steep cobbled alleyways we wanted to see, especially in temperatures hitting 39°C (102°F). 🔥🥵 So we decided to shake things up by spending one night within the medieval castle of Óbidos, and one night in a countryside villa outside of Leiria. 🏰🦌
A big thanks to Denny for being the perfect partner in adventure and silliness over the last 4 weeks. It’s time to pack up and return to Shanghai: to the gym, the hairdresser, and the couch. 🛋️😌
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Tax Travel
We’ve reached Lisbon in Portugal, and at this point I should explain why we’re doing so much traveling.
It’s not *just* because we’re making up for being away from Europe for 4 years, although that’s a big part of it. It’s also because every 6 years, everyone on a work permit in China is obliged to leave for 30 days in order to avoid being taxed on their global income. So we decided to spend the month of August visiting a combination of places which have some kind of family significance (🇬🇧🇨🇿🇦🇹) as well as places we’ve been hearing about from Asia for many years (🇲🇹🇵🇹).
We thought that at this point we might have become a little tired of being on the move for so long. And it’s true that we’re starting to get bored of all our clothes. But Lisbon has far too much to offer to make weariness an option. Unfortunately that includes tapas bars, where it’s way too easy to over-order on the unpasteurised cheeses and the white port cocktails. So maybe that’ll fix the problem with our clothes, since we’ll soon be needing a whole new wardrobe of elastic-waisted sweatpants and loose-fitting muumuus. 🎈🐷
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A Compact Tour of Malta & Gozo
Our Maltese adventure is at an end. Malta is the world’s 10th smallest country, and everything about it is compact: compact land-mass; compact streets; compact cars. We hired one of them and zipped around from place to place, and all on one tank of petrol. 🚗
It’s convenient that English is one of the official languages of Malta, because the Maltese language is pretty impenetrable. Everyone, don’t forget to dot your Ġs and cross your Ħs… 🤷♂️ There are more than 360 churches here, which means there’s one church for every 1,000 residents. ⛪️ But you’ll be happy to know that I didn’t include too many of them in this video compilation.
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Bohemia & Vienna
I couldn’t have hoped for a better birthday, at the end of a great week that family Fuchs/Fox/Lindsey/Newell will remember for many years to come.
We were expecting the discomfort of an August heatwave, and hordes of tourists. Instead we had a surprising amount of rain, but relatively empty streets. So I guess it worked out OK on balance..? ☔️⚖️🤷♂️ Maybe the proof is in the video watching.
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The Ninth Person On This Trip
We decided to bring three generations together for a Czech family pilgrimage, in this one unique window of opportunity: while Denny and I were visiting Europe from Shanghai; while Dad and Ann were still young enough to travel; while memories of our family history were still fresh in our minds; and before my teenage nephews Benjamin and Jacob flew the coop to university. On top of that, having been unable to spend any time together as a family during COVID times, it was also the perfect way to force us all to be in each other’s company for a week. The last time I saw my nephews, they were children. Now they are mountain-sized adults, whose cheeky personalities I feel like I’m getting to know for the first time.
Along with my brother Daniel and his wife Helen, the 9th person accompanying us on this trip is the spirit of my Grandmother (Babička). We started the trip in Prague, where she had ended up after the war, and where my father and uncle Jirka were subsequently born. And we’re making our way down to her birthplace of Vienna. But yesterday we made a special visit to the sleepy town of Milevsko in Southern Bohemia. That’s where Babička’s parents in Vienna (the Neumanns) had desperately sent her and her sister to live with their grandparents (the Aschermanns) after the annexation of Austria into the German Reich in 1938. She was 17, her sister was 15, and their little brother had been too young to travel, so had stayed in Vienna with his parents.
Babička was the only member of the Neumann and Aschermann families to survive the holocaust. The building where she lived in Milevsko has since been knocked down and rebuilt into a hardware store. And the local synagogue has since been reconsecrated into a church.
At the entrance to the church, there was a very nice memorial to the old synagogue, and to the victims of the holocaust from the town. Despite all this loss, the fact that the Aschermanns’ great great great grandchildren could pose for a photo in front of this memorial was enough to feel like we were breathing fresh life into the memory of my family, and all the other Jewish families of Milevsko.
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London Homecoming
Don’t wait until the next wedding, or the next funeral. We can always make the effort to meet each other, simply to show that we value the connection we have with one another. 👫
After four years away, this was by far the best of all London homecomings. I’m sure I wasn’t the only person in these photos who had been feeling nervous about seeing each other again. We’ve all become so adult, so independent. So concerned with our own family units, our own problems. But in the end it took just one afternoon to forget about the years apart, and to get back to making new memories together. 🥰
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My Rabbi Aaron
I want to introduce you all to my Rabbi in North-West London, Rabbi Aaron Goldstein. He generously made time for an impromptu coffee together while I’m here on a short visit.
He’s an amazing leader for the local community, as well as a tireless advocate for women, for the Jewish diaspora in Ukraine, for immigrants in the UK, for LGBT+ inclusion, for Muslim Uighurs in Xinjiang, for democracy in Israel, and for many more causes that a lot of us talk about but don’t know how to support. And on top of all that, he’s just… a nice guy.
We only had 20 minutes together, but just knowing that people like him exist makes me feel a bit better about this forsaken little planet. 🌍💙
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Fifteen Years of Nurture
For the last 15 years, I have nurtured a network of HR and Talent leaders around the world, but especially in Tokyo. My ethos was always simply to treat everyone as human beings, rather than to commoditise relationships by treating them as “clients” or “candidates.”
I’m not sure I was always successful in this endeavour. But now that I’ve retired as a headhunter, I’m happy that I can still count so many of them as friends. And I’m grateful that a handful of these special people were able to make some time for a meet-up in this special city.
過去15 年間、私は世界中、特に東京において人事および人材リーダーのネットワークを築いて来ました。私の理念は常に、すべての人を「顧客」や「候補者」として扱うことで関係性を商品化せず、人として関わることでした。
この取り組みで常に成功したかどうかはわかりません。しかし、ヘッドハンターとして引退した今でも、たくさんの人をまだ友人と呼べることに満足しています。そして、少数の特別な人たちと時間を共有し、この特別な都市で集まれたことに感謝しています。
これからもよろしきお願いします❣️
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Touchdown Tokyo!
東京にタッチダウン🗼‼️
Touchdown Tokyo!
I’m back in the country where my love affair with Asia first started back in 1999. 😳
And what better way to spend the day than people-watching in Shinagawa, kaiten-sushi in Shinjuku, scramble-crossing in Shibuya, and a coffee date in Akasaka with the beautiful Sonya Ito. 💜👫💜
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You're In The Right Place
This week marks one year since the beginning of the Shanghai citywide lockdown. 🔒🏙️
Shanghai today has now fully re-opened to visitors. The streets are busy with tourists, and smiles are returning. Long-term planning has started to creep into our consciousness again, which is a stark contrast to our day-by-day existence one year ago. So does it feel like normalcy has returned?
To those who can finally visit us in Shanghai, it probably seems that way. But for those of us who’ve been here the whole time, I feel like we’re only now beginning to process our feelings towards this city, and what we want our lives to look like from now on. Relationship status: It’s complicated.
As for Denny and me, we’re still doing well, and we’re still holding on to the same sense of adventure that first brought us here 8 years ago. But I’m also aware that I’m not posting as much on social media as I used to, which has got me thinking about why that was. Maybe I’m just used to this city, and don’t feel like sharing what has these days become so familiar. Maybe that’s it. Maybe. Whatever’s going on, I’m glad that there are still occasions when I look up and see something I haven’t noticed before, and feel inspired to share some thoughts.
I’m sure these are feelings that many people would have experienced at some point over the last year. So if you’re one of those people, I hope you’re well. I hope you’re in the right place. And if you’re not entirely sure, then maybe that’s OK too. Just remember to look up every now and again, and see what signs present themselves. 🙄
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